neurosis ain't just a band.

If something bothers me, I fixate on it until it is at an unhealthy obessive level.

This morning, still in my pajamas, I mowed the back lawn because I was sitting on the back patio with my coffee staring at it for 15 minutes until I could take it no more.

The first time I painted my bathroom, I misjudged my bright color tolerance. It lasted 10 hours before I was at Home Depot to get a more muted shade. Now that we've lived in the house for a while, I realize that muted blue drives me nuts now. While sitting on the toilet, I wish I could knock down some walls to make the shape of my bathroom make sense. Not to mention the shower stall, bathtub, and vinyl flooring- it is all causing my slow painful death.

My bathroom looks like it belongs in a mobile home in Nantucket and well, I have never even been to Nantucket.

It's an improvement over the biblical saying stenciled room with wood paneling I started with but it's still not what it should/ could be.

Since our house was built in 1941, we try not to get anything made after the 60s with the exception of the music/records room but that just cannot be done with this trainwreck in home design. I am will to bet a buhzillion dollars that James won't let me demo our one and only bathroom because the design pisses me off. If you're looking for a side bet, a safe one is James not letting me pull out the psychotic vinyl early 90s flooring and replace it with tile before he let's me demo the bathroom design. See the endless cycle of despair I find myself in?

Paint is my only option. I can make new curtains in 15 minutes if the new grey shade doesn't go with the platinum/orange curtains I made last fall. Staring at my options this afternoon, no shades of grey struck me as perfect which makes sense for a person more comfortable with extremes. I am going to have to try again tomorrow.